A prayer for the wild at heart, kept in cages.

I did not blog for a whole month, and when I finally do, it’s two entries in the space of twenty-four hours. All right, after the last entry which was kind of tongue-in-cheek and player-ish, let’s get a little more serious here. By the way, my female friends (and a couple of gay ones) have been telling me they like the ‘emo’ me. They find my entries totally appealing when I pour my hearts out and let my emotions loose. And most of the time, it involves this girl called Miss Y. Which brings me to my next point- why still Miss Y (copyright Delun)?

You see, she is more than just a girl in my class. She is a symbol, an icon which allows my readers to relate and perhaps dream a little- be it letting themselves be her (sad, lonely girl trapped in a relationship with a fat ass who loves donuts while secretly having the hots for this tall, dark, handsome guy from her Sociology class); or letting themselves be me (tall, dark, handsome guy having this gigantic crush on this girl from his Sociology class whom he knows nothing about). Like they say, love is magical- only if you don’t know what a total b*tch she actually is. So, let Miss Y be magic. Let her be my muse. Let her exist only on this blog.

So, I have been pretty busy this past month with the usual stuff- friends, soccer, hanging out, movies, laptop, Olympics, club, binge-drink, sleep around, pregnancy test kits (I could go on, but we’ll be here all day). Let’s talk about two television series that totally captured my imagination- and no, it’s not some lame channel 8 slapstick love comedy drama serial.

Let’s start with this show called Gossip Girl (here and here). I caught the whole season one (eighteen episodes) in like three days (anyway, season two debuts 1^st September, together with Prison Break). I shan’t go into the details in case I bore the crap out of you, but I do admit I find it kind of astonishing that I am actually attracted to such a bimbo-ic show. I mean, Gossip Girl is totally different from my usual Prison Break or Heroes. It’s more like the O.C. meet Sex and the City. In short, it revolves a around a group of rich little kids from high society in New York who go to school together. There’s sex, drugs, parents issue and of course, relationship problems (but of course).

For about a week, I fell totally in love with this character Serena van der Woodsen played by the lovable Blake Lively. She has THE looks (tall, long hair) and THE character (complicated bad-girl-turns-good). Like always, bad girls attract boys and bad boys attract girls- it’s never-ending, I tell you. So, she had her issues- she was drunk, she slept with her best friend’s boyfriend, she ran away in guilt and now, she’s back to make it all up to them. By the way, the best friend’s boyfriend I was talking about, he’s f*cking cute (here and here)- I would totally do him in a second if I’m gay.

Along her road to redemption, this high society girl met this boy next door and fell heads over heels in love with his down-to-earth personality (which is not unlike mine). They dated and everything, but they did it the modest way (his way)- a simple movie and dinner followed by a walk home (no fancy parties with caviar and champagne and making out drunk in the limousine). They were totally smitten with each other, and then inevitably, he found out about her unpleasant past and he could not accept her keeping it from him. He knew what sort of a girl she was, but he thought she had come clean at the start of the relationship, but apparently, every girl has her little secrets.

This really got me thinking. I mean, the one whom you are holding hands with right now, f*ck me, but who knows? They may have had an abortion a couple of years back or they may have talked their ex into having an abortion before. Come on, our words and actions from the past are not stored in chat logs and the history folder. So, does that thought haunt you? Like seriously, what would you do if that actually happens? For me, I can accept anything- as long as you tell me before things get serious. I would very much prefer to know what sort of an environment I am sticking my dick into, to put it bluntly. I’m pretty cool when it comes to telling the truth- I know I have my past, but I wouldn’t hide anything from you now, would I? But remember- everyone has his/her secrets. The truth depends on what you choose to believe (google Memento for more details), like they say- what you don’t know cannot hurt you……

Now, for the second show, it’s a whole lot deeper and a whole lot more interesting. Californication (here and here), anyone? While I came to know of GG from Xiaxue’s blog, Californication was introduced to me by none other than Ivan (no nickname here, couldn’t think of any). He just kind of told me it contained partial nudity and was shown primetime in America, and I was like, what’s new? Over there, every other day you can find a celebrity photographed without her panties on or having a nipple slip live on national television. So, I was bored one afternoon and I decided to check out some boobs. And guess what? I caught all twelve episodes of season one in like half a day.

And no, it’s not the nudity that drew me to the show, you dirty-minded wankers. It’s the issues they discussed that intrigued me. See, it’s about this washed-up forty-year-old writer who divorced his wife and shares custody of their only daughter. He now wants his ex-wife back, and their daughter tries her best to help them patch up. The humour’s dry and witty, and oh, did I tell you that he uses his charm and fame to sleep with a different girl every night? And oh, did you know that one of the girls he slept with is the daughter of the man whom his ex-wife is soon going to marry? Yeah, it’s that f*cked up- see, I told you.

Well, the struggles he had when he was younger and the problems with his ex-wife are so real and insightful, it made me realise that love is so much more than just ‘I love you forever’, some passionate sex and holding each other’s hand watching the sunset by the beach. There are issues in all relationships, and there is no such thing as the perfect girl- just the one you can’t live without. And I thought David Duchovny portrayed his character rather well. He’s like this player lost in this sea of pussies, and he finally realises that the things that matter most to him isn’t his books or his fame or the money or the free sex- it’s his daughter and the love of his life he lost along the way. All these sleeping around gets me him nowhere and it is only twelve episodes so there really isn’t any credible ending for the first season. Anyway, season two will be back on 28^th September- remember to catch it via web-streaming on some free China website.

Okay, I shall end my entry with this wonderful quote from him- for me, there are always tons of lovemaking, but no real love. The  endless parade of ladies continues, but the emptiness within remains.

Another ladies’ night of loneliness beckons.

First things first, I would like to apologise to all my fans out there who have been logging in to read my blog religiously this whole time. The view-count statistics does not lie, and of course, the whole time, my dear friends have been constantly enquiring about my absence in the blogging fraternity, and more specifically, asking about a certain Miss Y (more on that later). So, why have I not been blogging? Well, it’s a long story. Okay, to keep it short, I met this Russian chick at MOS one beautiful evening, who shared my interest in paintings (I’m a huge van Gogh fan, you didn’t know?). So, we proceeded to her rented apartment to continue our conversation on the Impressionism era over some coffee. Then I told her I was an avid blogger and she asked to see my blog. She was mightily impressed by the number of entries I put up each week (she had equally impeccable taste in art, men and blogs), so she dared me to stop blogging for a month, in return she would let me use her for my figure drawings. What else could I have said, my friend? You should never deny a lady the opportunity to strip naked for the sake of art.

Which kind of brings me here, one month later. Tons of sh*t had happened, and I had a million thoughts to blog about. Every night I go to bed with my thoughts and it stabbed at my heart when I couldn’t share my valuable insight with you good people, but I assure you in the coming months I will let you in. So, let not waste any more time and talk about the name that’s on everyone’s lips- and no, it’s not Michael Phelps.

Who else but our dear Miss Y? She is a legend around here, but sad to say, she is but an elusive dream for me. She is still stuck with Donut-Boy and it breaks my heart every time I picture her feeding him some of that donuts. But once again, I have been proven right- no girl is perfect, and THE ONE does not exist. Not for me, not for you, not for anyone. According to my reliable sources, she is quite a pain in the ass in person. I mean, she already tops my list in the looks, height and hair department, what are the odds of she having the personality I desire? And quite rightly so. It’s a new school term, and those naive little freshmen are there for the taking. Anyway, it’s been almost a year now, and it’s about time I move on. But no worries, I will still be seeing her in school and I promise you she would still be the first face I look for when I step into any lecture hall, and she would still be a feature on this blog. Miss Y, Miss Y, Miss Y……

So, the most pressing topic is out of the way, and I have a million other things to tell you! Where do I start? Let’s stay on the one topic making the news- the Olympics. Thanks to web-streaming technology and my laptop (and the school holidays), this has got to be the Olympics I followed the most. From Phelps to Nadal to the Dream Team, I never let any one of them out of my sight. And there had been hardly any surprises- the bullet from Baltimore wrote himself into the history books at Beijing; Nadal took gold and number one ranking from Federer; and the USA basketball team has swept all before them so far.

But something happened a couple of days ago that broke my heart- and no, it’s not China A team beating China B team in the women’s table-tennis final (it’s a hot debate). It was this Chinese athlete– Liu Xiang. I was waiting to catch his heats live, but instead I saw him kicking out at a dressing room door (ala Billy Gallas) and then withdrawing from the race. The faces of the tens of thousands of fans in the stadium said it all. I mean, I totally feel for him. Four years in waiting, buckets of sweat, hours of training daily, the first and probably the last Olympics in China for the next hundred years, the world watching, the great Chinese hope on the track, and his foot failed him. It’s like Megan Fox told William Hung she would let him bang her in a week’s time, and when that big day comes, Megan is in her see-through thong lying in bed for William, he walks in, and he couldn’t get an erection- his dick failed him. How brutal life can be.

Now, let’s talk about Singapore’s silver medal at the Olympics. Let put the political correctness and ‘nationalism’ to one side and be practical about this- the three women are not Singaporeans. Define Singaporeans- place of birth, or the decision of some official from the Immigration Authorities? How can you be so sure they will settle down in Singapore and not go back to their motherland? Anyone remember the name Egmar Goncalves? We gave him citizenship so that he could wear our colours on the pitch. Guess what? After he was no longer in the national team, he decided to return to Brazil for good. What makes you think those three women would be any different? The cynic in me says they are all doing if for the $750,000- there is no chance they could ever make as much if they were to play anywhere else in this world. If in ten years’ time, they go back to China and start their families, wouldn’t it have been better to use the $750,000 as an ERP offset package? Anyway, I reckon none of them would have known how to sing “Majulah Singapura” had the China table-tennis stars all did a Liu Xiang- they can’t even do an interview in English, what chances have they got at Malay? So, it was a blessing in disguise we finished second as we were spared the humiliation.

And my last point concerns the National Day Rally by our Prime Minister Lee Hsien Loong, his Majesty. Once again, he is giving out more of our money, which kind of made me agree with most of what he had to say, other than the foreign talent issue (read above paragraph for more). However, the main focal point of his Majesty’s speech was the greying population in Singapore and the decreasing number of babies. Hey, it’s not like I’m not contributing. I work so hard at giving tuition, where the hell do you think my 1.5K pay goes to? The kid whose name I do not know and mother whose face I barely recognise, that’s where it goes to. See, like Barry and Benitez, the baby and me, it’s so not my fault. I was drunk, Vitamin E was wrecking havoc in my head, the nearest 7-11 ran out of condoms, she was sticking her tongue down my throat, my dick was disobedient. Plus that b*tch comes from a strict Evangelical Christian family who is totally against abortion. See, it’s not my fault.

So, your Majesty Lee, listen to me when I say f*ck it with all those baby bonuses and paternity leave sh*t. Trust me- you just need to ban the sale of condoms, lower the drinking age to UK levels and hand out religion bonuses to anyone who becomes a Christian. By the way, I was told you were already looking for your successor.

Well, look no further, your Majesty.

With “Batman Begins“, writer/director Christopher Nolan explored how Bruce Wayne became the legendary hero known to the world as Batman. When Nolan returned with “The Dark Knight“, Batman has now defined Bruce Wayne’s true identity.

Bruce Wayne (Christian Bale) begins to realize that he has unleashed a symbol, this Batman, and that symbol can’t have limits. He can’t show weakness. So there is now a conflict between what’s good for Bruce and what’s right for Batman to do, and “the two of them are not always compatible,” remarks Bale.

The dark knight has taken over the billionaire’s life, and it is something he cannot escape from, anymore.

Bruce initially saw Batman as a short-term crusade, as a symbol to inspire the good people of Gotham to take their city back. In Harvey Dent (Aaron Eckhart), he finally sees the hero that Gotham needs—the hero with a face, not one wearing a mask.

The respect for Batman is mutually returned by Harvey Dent. “Harvey sees Batman fighting crime in a way that he would like to, but cannot,” remarks Eckhart. But Harvey’s thoughts on the billionaire? “He thinks Bruce is a complete upper-class twit,” director Nolan affirms. “It would astonish him to find out he is really the man behind the mask.”

And then there is assistant district attorney Rachel Dawes (Maggie Gyllenhaal), who is the one true love of Bruce Wayne… and the current girl of Harvey Dent. “Rachel made the decision that it is impossible for her to be with Bruce as long as he is Batman. Then Harvey Dent came into her life, and she is crazy about him.”

The Dark Knight also stars Nestor Carbonell as the Mayor of Gotham City, and Anthony Michael Hall as a television news reporter. With Batman are his two closest confidants- Alfred (Michael Caine) and Lucius Fox (Morgan Freeman).

Sources: superheroprofiles.com  [Photos and production notes courtesy of Warner Bros. Pictures. TM & © DC Comics]

Reviews: superheroprofiles.com, rollingstone.com

YouTube: clip 01, clip 02

David Letterman Review: HERE

Official Website: HERE

You know what pleases a guy the most? I mean, other than photographing his girlfriend using his Sony SLR digital camera. Perhaps photographing someone else’s wife-to-be? Nah, I’m just kidding.

See, I was on Facebook the other day, and I happened to chance upon some photographs of an ex- no, not THOSE photographs in my encrypted hard disk, just some random photos of her. Well, it is certainly times like this when I truly understand the meaning of the phrase ‘love is blind’, because honestly, I must have been f*cking blind. I mean, no sour grapes or anything, she looked like her face had a high-speed collision with a lorry. No sh*t- a few of you guys should know who I am referring to. I would like to think she wasn’t this bad when we were still together, but, really, she totally let herself slide after we broke up, and it is absolutely no fault of mine. Come on, it’s just a break up, it’s not f*cking Armageddon or anything. Get a grip, lady.

So, you must be thinking I was pretty pleased and all. But wait, I saw something else that completely made my day- her current boyfriend. And his collision with a Boeing A380. Not only did her looks slide, her taste in guys deteriorated as well. Well, all in all, a great day for me. And now that I have talked the talk, it’s time to walk the walk.

You can be pretty damn sure my next girlfriend has got enormous shoes to fill. Over to you, Miss Y.

Or click HERE if you are somewhere in the Amazon.

Are you seeing what I’m seeing? I have never seen an older left

winger in the history of Manchester United. Die already, old fart-

kindly move over for the South Korean marathon runner, Ji.

With more medals put together than the whole Chelski, Arsenal and

Liverpool squads, why the f*ck can’t Gary and Ryan retire while

they are still on top? I can’t see us winning anything with these two

pensioners around.

I’m enjoying the Spanish sun with Nereida while Shrek is enjoying

the English one with a bunch of sweaty men. Life is beautiful.

Maybe he’s on the phone with my agent. Or maybe it’s the Senor

Calderon. Or he’s checking out the prices of houses in Madrid. For me.

Got this interesting story from a friend’s friend’s blog. Interesting. Here goes:

~

A wandering traveller, passing through a small town. It was sunset. He was travelling for 4 days straight and was thirsty. He walked towards the town well and found that it was guarded. A burly villager stopped him.

Big strong guy: The well cannot be used by anyone today. The holy man needs it. You have to wait till sunrise, for then the holy man will be gone.

As a wanderer looking for no trouble, he retreated to a corner of the town square. Looking around, he saw villagers gathering. Many of them looked thirsty for the looks of their dried lips.

He went to sit beside an old man.

Traveller: Who is the holy man? What are you people waiting for?

Old man: No one knows. He knows everything and told us not to drink for a day. He is going to make a speech soon. Hush.

A crowd starts to gather. Everyone was quiet. Waiting for the holy man.

As it approaches dusk, a small hooded figure walked towards the centre of the square.

He took of his hood. Grasps and noises emerged from the crowd. The holy man is a young girl!

Old man: I see, he appears in different forms, aha, he was an old man when I saw him 60 years ago.

Girl: Come let’s drink. Everyone hold a cup of water from this well for it has been blessed. BUT drink only after I tell you to.

Every villager took a cup. The young girl took a cup, walked towards the traveller and the old man.

Girl: I remember you, old father. Do you want to take a cup too?

Old man: Thank You. I am old, give it the traveller. If I understood, I don't need it anymore.

The traveller humbly took the cup and looked into the contents of the wooden cup.

What’s so special about the water?

The young girl walked backed to the centre. She smiled.

Girl: Now drink as much as you liked from the cup. Any amount you want. After that, give me the remaining water if you have any, for I have some use for it.

They drank, some gulped down everything, others drank half. Everyone was different.

Old man: Drink, my friend.

The traveller was thirsty, but he was weathered and he could wait till sunrise.

He only took a sip.

Traveller: Let me see what is she going to do with my water.

Girl: Ah, I see everyone has finished. Let me say something, the water in the cup is actually all the sorrows, fears and sadness everyone is going to face in the future. I shall drink down your sorrows, fears and sadness for you.

There was a commotion again. A man that drank the whole cup fell onto his knees and cried. Many like him followed.

Some that drank only a little like what the traveller did smile.

Old man: Well done, my friend.

The young girl drank the remains of every single cup. The traveller was last in line. When it was his turn, the girl looked terrible. She had too much.

Traveller: Why did you do this?

Girl: Your sorrows are mine. That is my job, because you believed.

She took the traveller’s cup and smiled.

Girl: Only a sip.

She drank every single drop and collapsed into the traveller’s arms.

No one knew what happened to the girl. A carriage came and picked her.

The traveller set off at the next sunrise. He was different inside, he knew it. For the girl whispered something into his ears when she collapsed.

Girl: __________________________________________

Lalala, Don't tell YOU!

~

Pupils are being rewarded for writing obscenities in their GCSE English examinations even when it has nothing to do with the question. One pupil who wrote "f*** off" was given marks for accurate spelling and conveying a meaning successfully. His paper was marked by Peter Buckroyd, a chief examiner who has instructed fellow examiners to mark in the same way. He told trainee examiners recently to adhere strictly to the mark scheme, to the extent that pupils who wrote only expletives on their papers should be awarded points..."It would be wicked to give it zero, because it does show some very basic skills we are looking for - like conveying some meaning and some spelling. It's better than someone that doesn't write anything at all. It shows more skills than somebody who leaves the page blank" - The Times.